Vendor Gratuities

The age-old wedding question: Which vendors should I tip, and how much?

Tips, or gratuities, for your vendors is entirely optional. If you can allow for this in your budget once all your contracts are signed and you have a good handle on actual costs, that is great. No wedding professional enters into a wedding contract with the mindset: "well, I'll get a bonus, so I'll cut back on my fees some." That is the least professional thing he or she can do. So, it is up to you as the bride to make this call.

When you give a photographer or caterer an extra percentage at the end of the day, you are saying that you appreciated all the hard work and extra effort that he or she put forth -- for going that extra mile. It says "hey, I loved what you did and will more than likely refer you to my friends and family if I have the opportunity." They get the message loud and clear. That's not to say, on the other hand, that if there is no bonus, you are unhappy with their services. A sincere note or email after the wedding goes a long way also. A small gift also means a lot.

In my case, being the wedding coordinator, the decision may not be as easy sometimes. I had a bride's mother tell me once, after giving me a lovely gift with a beautiful thank-you note, that she felt she might insult me by giving me a cash bonus. Of course, I lovingly took the gift, and never thought any more about it. But, don't be afraid of insulting your wedding coordinator by offering extra cash. I'll bet she will not turn it down.

Now, the other question. How much? Again, this is your call, but my suggestion is that in most cases, 20% is perfect. If your budget doesn't allow that much, 10% is appreciated also. For the most part, just use your common sense, put yourself in their shoes, then decide.